Friday, January 21, 2005

as forrester me, and as forrester you

Doug Forrester for Statehouse Janitor: Because the politicians in Trenton have been messing up the statehouse bathroom for far too long.

Someone just fired their marketing team... and rightfully so.
Truly, I am mystified.

Please pay special attention to the guy with the cigar. He got his acting debut on the Sopranos, which eventually lead to him landing this fine role.

Click here for the most recent rubbish from Conservative Businessman Doug Forrester!

Monday, January 17, 2005


*** a weekly counter ***

97: hours spent at work

4: number of times I've eaten out

25: years amanda has been alive

16,487: dollars raised and collected... beh

23: times i've listened to abbey road on repeat in this blasted office over the past 24 hours

5: number of times today I told my mom that I love her

1: foozeball table donated to the campaign (?!)

159: tissues used on my poor, sore nose

287: times that someone else genuinely made me laugh

Currently listening :
Abbey Road
By The Beatles
Release date: By 25 October, 1990

Friday, January 14, 2005

one flu over the monkey's nest

I've not been myself this week; perhaps a little more frank than moe with everyone. By nature, I am not a cantankerous person. I'd even say that I'm irritatingly upbeat, flexible to a fault.

Every now and again, however, ill's cloud rolls my way and rains it's shameful mess of tissues and vicks vapo-rub all over me as I then approach the mighty rubicon: do I utilize the force (and my lightsaber) to slay the wicked giant, or in my weakened state, do I sit down and take one for the teamsters?

This week, my friends, I chose the latter.

Sickness is an illness.
Don't spend too much time thinking about that.

Amazingly, despite the heavy doses of DayQuil, the monkey buttloads of vitamin C, the seemingly endless amounts of water and/or other hydrating fluids, and the collective 40 hours of sleep this week, I managed to get some work done. With the ominous shadow of a deadline looming over my head, it has been absolutely necessary to spend as much time as possible here at good ol' campaign headquarters. New Jersey will thank me later.

In the meantime, I dance with the devil in these beautiful buildings. I find affirmative action as a useful reunion. I would change his name if it made any difference, as I wait in line for a lasting confession.

** I have a really funny story involving several neckties from the salvation army and a home depot advertisement, but I don't have the energy right now to type it out. Remind me to tell you later. It's worth it. Really. Truly. Trust me. **

Find your way out of this one, lovelies...

Currently listening :
By Wrens
Release date: By 09 September, 2003

Wednesday, January 05, 2005

duressed to kill

call me naive, but I was completely unaware of the phenomenon. I had no idea it was a big deal. I've lived my entire life not realizing the importance of having someone to kiss on New Years Eve.

Really. I was unaware. Is this really a big deal? Forget however dorky I said I was yesterday. My levels may have just escalated.

Currently listening :
By Death Cab for Cutie
Release date: By 07 October, 2003

Tuesday, January 04, 2005

litmus pest

Oh simpletons and friends (simple friends... friends simply), hear me!

I decided quite some time ago, most likely when I was in 4th grade and found myself perpendicular to a fanny pack, that I am just really not cool.
I also, however, came to the conclusion that no one really is.

I can recall being confused by the actions of my uncle some years ago. He is my mother's youngest brother, 10 years my senior. I always thought he was pretty cool, mostly with it (whatever "it" is). His hair, his clothes, his car changing with whatever fashion and style had to offer, he was fairly hip. I guess. I thought. Maybe. Perhaps (what the hell am I talking about? I was 10. I thought he was sooo kewl).
My confusions arose a few times over the years however; my confusion over his coolness (kewlness). Not just with his decision to perm his hair sometime around 1984, nor only with his sudden use of eye-liner around 1987, but also (mostly) with his blatant hate for technology all through the nineties.

Email! What a cool, new thing! Right? WRONG. Email is the devil.
Cell phones! Awesome, just like Zak Morris, right?! WRONG AGAIN.
So, Email... it's the devil, right? BING!
And cell phones, they're pretty much the bain of society, right? BING AGAIN!
What about Dave Matthews Band? Too Trendy.
New Beetles? Too new.
Ace Ventura? Overrated.
Argyle Socks? Nerds are "in". No thanks.
Although I've fallen prey to it on more than one occasion, I have more often than not been completely mystified by the fact that it is indeed hip to be square. In fact, hipper to be square than to be hip, if that makes any sense at all.

Sooo... I'm pretty square.
But in the not hip way.
On most things anyway.
On some things I'm square because it's actually square, which in turn makes it hip.
On other things I'm hip, which makes it square because it's not hip to be hip.

** I'm fairly certain that I've never said hip so frequently in such a short period of time. **

I gave up a long time ago.

I like my cell phone and hate to be unreachable (but I really hate blackberries, PDA's and anyone who talks loudly on their phones in public places).

I admittedly am a huge advocate of email (but I know very much the special quality that snail mail holds and write more letters than anyone else I know. Honest to goodness, personal letters).

I occasionally fall prey to internet jargon such as btw and brb (however, I absolutely abhor the use of "lol" or "lmao").

I listen to Dave Matthews Band, own 10 Things I Hate About You on DVD, travel with a neck pillow, shop at Wal*Mart, don't drink coffee, enjoy Maroon 5 (it's a guilty pleasure... whatever that means), and am not taking any sort of medication.

How can I survive (you might ask)?!

I've come to terms with the fact that I am a dork.
But wait... oh shit. Dorks are in right now, aren't they?

Currently listening :
How to Dismantle an Atomic Bomb
By U2
Release date: By 23 November, 2004